Core for More Bible Study — July 1, 2026
Successful Coaching – P2 – Managing Differences In Ministry
"One of the greatest myths in ministry is that because we're Christians, we'll never have disagreements. The reality is just the opposite. Whenever passionate people are committed to God's work, there will be differences of opinion. The early church experienced them. The apostles experienced them. Healthy churches experience them today. The question isn't whether differences will occur. The question is whether we'll handle them in a Christ-like and productive way."
Differences At Work
Differences in the workplace are common and typically center around execution questions such as what needs to be done, who is responsible, and how, when, and why it should happen.
"As ministry leaders, we face these questions every week.
- Should we launch another small group this semester?
- Who should teach the children's class?
- Should we spend money on outreach or on facility improvements?
- Should Vacation Bible School be in June or July?
- Should worship begin with praise music or a testimony?
Notice that these are not questions of faith. They're questions of execution. Most disagreements in church leadership are not about whether we love God—they're about the best way to accomplish God's mission. That's important to remember because if we mistake an execution or application issue for a spiritual issue, we can unintentionally create division where there doesn't need to be any."
Example:
"The outreach pastor wants to invest more in community events. The finance team wants to build stronger financial reserves. Both want the church to flourish. They're simply viewing stewardship from different perspectives."
What Is A Difference?
We define a difference as a conflict or a lack of agreement between parties.
"A difference simply means two people see the situation differently. Neither person has to be wrong. In ministry, faithful people can arrive at different conclusions while pursuing the same Kingdom purpose. Our responsibility isn't to eliminate differences. Our responsibility is to honor Christ in how we manage them."
You can recognize a difference is present...
"One sign is when you can't find any value in the other person's perspective. Another sign is when you realize your priorities seem completely different. For example, one ministry leader may prioritize excellence and organization. Another may prioritize flexibility and relationships. Neither value is wrong. But if we stop listening, those differences can quickly become personal."
Defining the Difference and Timing
The first step in resolution is to clearly define the difference before attempting to resolve it.
"Too often ministry leaders start solving problems before they've actually agreed on what the issue is. Sometimes we spend an hour discussing solutions only to discover we weren't talking about the same problem. Good leaders slow the conversation down and ask, 'What exactly are we trying to solve?' Clarity always comes before resolution."
"When discussing ministry decisions, begin by explaining what matters to you.
When To Discuss The Difference
For example, 'What's important to me is creating an excellent first impression because guests often decide within minutes whether they'll return.' That statement doesn't criticize anyone. It simply explains your heart and your purpose."
"Then invite the other person to share what's important to them. Ask, 'Tell me what you really care about.' Then ask, 'Why?' Often you'll discover values you never knew existed. Someone may oppose changing the worship schedule, not because they dislike change, but because they're concerned about serving elderly members who depend on consistency."
"Timing matters. Never force an important ministry conversation immediately after a difficult board meeting, a stressful Sunday morning, or during a church crisis. People don't make their best decisions when they're emotionally exhausted."
"If emotions are high, it's perfectly acceptable to say, 'Let's pray about this, think about it, and continue our conversation tomorrow.' Sometimes the most spiritual decision is simply waiting until everyone can think clearly."
Discussion Techniques and Conclusion
"The goal isn't to prove your ministry is more important than someone else's. The goal is to discover the best solution for God's Kingdom. Healthy ministry discussions sound like this: 'Help me understand your perspective.' 'Tell me more.' 'What concerns you most?' These questions invite collaboration instead of competition."
"Some ministry decisions are easy. Others require several conversations. The Jerusalem Council in Acts 15 didn't reach a decision in five minutes. Important decisions often require prayer, discussion, wisdom, and patience."
"There will be occasions when, as leaders, you must make a decision that not everyone agrees with. When that happens, always acknowledge the value of the other person's perspective. People don't always need you to choose their idea. But they do need to know they were heard and respected."
"Once a decision has been made, communicate it clearly. For example, 'After prayer and discussion, we've decided to launch a fourth worship service because we're running out of seating and want to create more opportunities for guests to hear the Gospel.' When people understand the ministry's purpose behind a decision, they're far more likely to support it."
The Four Great Truths
- People don't change that much - "God has uniquely gifted every believer.
- Don't try to put into someone what was left out - Romans 12 and 1 Corinthians 12 remind us that the Body of Christ is made up of many different members with different gifts.
- Draw out of them what's already there –
- That's going to be hard enough - Our responsibility isn't to make everyone identical. Our responsibility is to help people discover and use the gifts God has already placed within them."
Management Truths and Old School vs. New School
"As ministry leaders, we have four important responsibilities. We prayerfully select the right people. We clearly communicate expectations. We encourage and inspire them to serve faithfully. And we help them grow spiritually and in their ministry gifts."
"In many churches years ago, leadership often focused on correcting weaknesses. If someone struggled in an area, the solution was usually more correction. While accountability is important, constantly focusing on weaknesses often discourages volunteers."
"Today's most effective ministry leaders intentionally develop people's strengths. When someone has the gift of hospitality, help them excel in hospitality. When someone has the gift of teaching, give them opportunities to teach. When someone has the gift of administration, allow them to organize ministries effectively. People flourish when they're serving where God designed them to serve."
What Really Works
"When recruiting volunteers or ministry leaders, don't look only at experience. Look for God-given talent, character, faithfulness, teachability, and a servant's heart. Skills can often be developed. Character and calling are much harder to manufacture."
"When assigning ministry responsibilities, define the outcome instead of controlling every detail. For example, Instead of telling the hospitality team exactly how to greet every guest, define the outcome: 'We want every person who walks through our doors to feel genuinely welcomed and valued.' Then allow the team to use their gifts to accomplish that mission."
"The greatest growth happens when people serve from their strengths. Someone who loves encouraging people will naturally thrive in care ministry. Someone gifted in organization may flourish behind the scenes. Not every servant is called to the platform, and not every leader is called to administration. That's the beauty of the Body of Christ."
"As ministry coaches and leaders, our responsibility isn't to force people into positions where they struggle. Our responsibility is to help them discover where God has gifted them to make the greatest Kingdom impact. When people serve where God has uniquely equipped them, ministry becomes joyful instead of burdensome. Churches become healthier, volunteers remain engaged longer, and ultimately Christ is glorified through the unique gifts of His people."
Closing
"As we conclude, I'd like to leave you with this question: 'Am I spending more time trying to change people into who I think they should be, or am I helping them become who God created them to be?' When we answer that question well, we build stronger leaders, healthier ministries, and a stronger church."