Falling for the Fantasy

Thirst Traps – Part 3

Today we will be dealing with a man with his lust issues. He was thirsting for a relationship to fulfill sexual desires.

Pastor, what is a Thirst Trap? We must be careful when we are thirsty because we will often settle for less than God's best.

A "thirst trap" is a photo or video posted on social media, intended to be sexually provocative or attention-grabbing, often in a coy or flattering way. The term combines the idea of "thirst" (sexual desire) and "trap," as the post is designed to lure or attract attention. The motivation can be a way to seek validation, affirm one's desirability, or share a sense of self-love and confidence.

The most dangerous person to the devil is a single believer on purpose for God. Singles are God's greatest tool for Kingdom purposes.

When you don't let Jesus quench your thirst, you'll fall for things that drain you.

Every person has thirst—for love, validation, purpose, or belonging—but when we try to quench that thirst with people, pleasures, or popularity, we fall into traps. Only Jesus can satisfy the soul's deepest thirst.

We proved last week that the most important figures in the Bible were single: Jesus, the Apostle Paul, John the Baptist, Joseph, Elijah, and Elisha. They were all single and fulfilling God's purpose.

Samson's First Mistake: Choosing by Sight

Judges 14:1-4 (AMP)

Samson went down to Timnah and at Timnah he saw a woman, one of the daughters of the Philistines. So he went back and told his father and his mother, "I saw a woman in Timnah, one of the daughters of the Philistines; now get her for me as a wife." But his father and mother said to him, "Is there no woman among the daughters of your relatives, or among all our people, that you must go to take a wife from the uncircumcised (pagan) Philistines?" And Samson said to his father, "Get her for me, because she looks pleasing to me." His father and mother did not know that it was of the Lord, and that He was seeking an occasion [to take action] against the Philistines. Now at that time the Philistines were ruling over Israel.

Key Observations

The word "down" speaks of his direction in the natural and spiritual. Timnah's location is strategic, serving as a crossroads between the two cultures. Where are you going to find a mate? Beauty is everywhere.

He saw—the downfall of most men was what they saw. Eyes and thighs. Philistines—Samson had a type, and that type killed him.

Samson cared about what his parents thought because he would not have gone back for their approval and guidance. Samson's decision is based on what he sees, reminding us of the importance of looking beyond outward appearances and seeking God's wisdom in our choices. Samson's interest in a Philistine woman is notable, as it foreshadows the tension between his divine calling as an Israelite judge and his personal desires.

The struggle between my purpose and my passion.

"She looks pleasing to me" indicates a focus on physical attraction rather than spiritual or cultural compatibility. It echoes the biblical theme of sight leading to temptation and sin, as seen in Genesis 3:6 with Eve and the forbidden fruit.

Samson's Pattern of Weakness

Judges 16:1-3 (AMP)

Then Samson went to Gaza and saw a prostitute there, and went in to her. The Gazites were told, "Samson has come here." So they surrounded the place and waited all night at the gate of the city to ambush him. They kept quiet all night, saying, "In the morning, when it is light, we will kill him." But Samson lay [resting] until midnight, then at midnight he got up and took hold of the doors of the city gate and the two door-posts, and pulled them up, [security] bar and all, and he put them on his shoulders and carried them up to the top of the hill which is opposite Hebron.

Samson was set apart for special service to God from birth. But for the most part, he ignored his vow of devotion and depended more and more on his own strength rather than on God's. If we become successful using our God-given gifts, we must not forget who gave us these gifts, skills, and abilities or the holy purpose that should direct their use. We must always remember that all our gifts and abilities come from God.

The Delilah Trap

Judges 16:4-5 (AMP)

After this he fell in love with a [Philistine] woman [living] in the Valley of Sorek, whose name was Delilah. So the [five] lords (governors) of the Philistines came to her and said to her, "Persuade him, and see where his great strength lies and [find out] how we may overpower him so that we may bind him to subdue him. And each of us will give you eleven hundred pieces of silver."

The Fall

It doesn't take much to fall in love—notice the word "fell." Can you name something that is good to fall into? Fell into a ditch, fell off a cliff, fell into a pit.

The Philistines were ruled by five rulers, not just one. Each ruler had authority over a different city—Ashdod, Ashkelon, Ekron, Gath, or Gaza. These cities were important trade and commerce centers. Given Delilah's character, it is little wonder that she betrayed Samson when these rich and powerful men paid her a personal visit and offered her a significant sum of money.

Let me help somebody here: If you keep ending up with the same kind of people, understand it's not them—it's you. Stop trying to be a superhero and save people from themselves. You are not the savior.

The Game of Deception

Judges 16:6-14 (AMP)

Delilah asked Samson three times about the source of his strength, and three times he lied to her. Each time she tested his answer, and each time he broke free. But he kept coming back.

Judges 16:15-16 (AMP)

Then she said to him, "How can you say, 'I love you,' when your heart is not with me? You have mocked me these three times and have not told me where your great strength lies." When she pressured him day after day with her words and pleaded with him, he was annoyed to death.

Four Keys to Think About When Seeking a Mate

Samson was deceived because he was naive to Delilah's real motives in asking about the source of his strength. Although he could strangle a lion, he could not see Delilah for who she really was or discern the plan she was working against him. How can you keep your desire for love and companionship from deceiving you?

1. You must decide what kind of person you will love before passion takes over.
2. Determine whether a person's character and faith in God are as desirable as his or her physical appearance.
3. Since most of the time you spend with your spouse will not involve sex, your companion's personality, temperament, and commitment to solve problems must be as gratifying as his or her kisses.
4. Be patient. Time and observation often reveal what is beneath a pleasant appearance and attentive touch.

The Final Betrayal

Judges 16:17-19 (AMP)

Then [finally] he told her everything that was in his heart and said to her, "A razor has never been used on my head, for I have been a Nazirite to God from my mother's womb. If I am shaved, then my strength will leave me, and I will become weak and be like any [other] man." Then Delilah realized that he had told her everything in his heart, so she sent and called for the Philistine lords, saying, "Come up this once, because he has told me everything in his heart." Then the Philistine lords came up to her and brought the money [they had promised] in their hands. She made Samson sleep on her knees, and she called a man and had him shave off the seven braids of his head. Then she began to abuse Samson, and his strength left him.

Delilah kept asking Samson for the secret of his strength until he finally grew tired of hearing her nagging and gave in. This was the second time that Samson allowed himself to be worn down by constant nagging (Judges 14:17). What a pitiful excuse for disobedience. Don't allow anyone—no matter how attractive, persuasive, or persistent—to talk you into doing wrong.

Delilah was a deceitful woman with honey on her lips and poison in her heart. Cold and calculating, she toyed with Samson, pretending to love him while looking for personal gain. How could Samson be so foolish? Four times Delilah took advantage of him. If he didn't realize what was happening after the first or second experience, surely he should have understood the situation by the fourth time!

We think Samson's behavior is foolish, but how many times do we find ourselves deceived by flattery and thus give in to temptation and wrong beliefs? Avoid falling prey to deceit by asking God to help you distinguish between deception and truth.

The Consequences

Judges 16:20-21 (AMP)

She said, "The Philistines are upon you, Samson!" And he awoke from his sleep and said, "I will go out as I have time after time and shake myself free." For Samson did not know that the Lord had departed from him. Then the Philistines seized him and gouged out his eyes; and they brought him down to Gaza and bound him with [two] bronze chains; and he was forced to be a grinder [of grain into flour at the mill] in the prison.

Samson, the mighty warrior, became a slave. Rather than killing him, the Philistines preferred to humiliate him by gouging out his eyes and making him grind grain. Samson now had plenty of time to wonder if Delilah's charms were worth spending the rest of his life in pain and humiliation.

Although God did not completely abandon Samson (Judges 16:28-30), He allowed Samson's sinful impulses and decisions to stand, and the consequences of his decisions followed naturally. We may choose to be close to God or to go our own way, but our choices have consequences. Samson didn't choose to be captured, but he chose to be with Delilah, and he could not escape the consequences of his decision.

Blinded and without strength, Samson was taken to Gaza, where he would spend the rest of his short life. The Philistines probably showed off their prize captive, Samson, to many dignitaries passing through. Ironically, it was in Gaza that Samson had earlier demonstrated his great strength by uprooting the city gates (Judges 16:1-3). Now he was an example of weakness.

The Warning

James 1:13-16 (AMP)

Let no one say when he is tempted, "I am being tempted by God" [for temptation does not originate from God, but from our own flaws]; for God cannot be tempted by [what is] evil, and He Himself tempts no one. But each one is tempted when he is dragged away, enticed and baited [to commit sin] by his own [worldly] desire (lust, passion). Then when the illicit desire has conceived, it gives birth to sin; and when sin has run its course, it gives birth to death. Do not be misled, my beloved brothers and sisters.

Redemption in Death

Judges 16:22-30 (AMP)

Samson's hair began to grow again. The Philistines brought him out to entertain them at a great celebration. Three thousand people gathered on the roof to watch.

Then Samson called to the Lord and said, "O Lord God, please remember me and please strengthen me just this one time, O God, and let me take vengeance on the Philistines for my two eyes." Samson took hold of the two middle [support] pillars on which the house rested, and braced himself against them, one with his right hand and the other with his left. And Samson said, "Let me die with the Philistines!" And he stretched out with all his might [collapsing the support pillars], and the house fell on the lords and on all the people who were in it. So the dead whom he killed at his death were more than those whom he had killed during his life.

When Samson got out of passion and into purpose, God gave him his power back.

Discussion Questions

1. The Direction You're Heading: Samson "went down" to Timnah—a phrase indicating both physical and spiritual direction. What relationships, habits, or pursuits are currently taking you "down" rather than up? How can you recognize when your desires are leading you away from God's purpose for your life?
2. Your Type Is Killing You: The sermon states, "If you keep ending up with the same kind of people, understand it's not them—it's you." What pattern keeps repeating in your relationships? What unhealed issue or character flaw in yourself keeps attracting the wrong people? What would it take for you to break this cycle?
3. Four Warnings, One Lesson: Delilah betrayed Samson four times before he finally told her the truth. How many times does God have to show you that a relationship, habit, or pursuit is destructive before you'll walk away? What "Delilah" in your life do you keep going back to despite repeated warnings?
4. The Four Keys to Choosing Wisely: Review the four keys for seeking a mate: (1) Decide what kind of person you'll love before passion takes over, (2) Value character as much as appearance, (3) Consider compatibility beyond physical attraction, (4) Be patient and observant. Which of these four keys have you ignored in past relationships? How can you apply them moving forward?
5. From Passion to Purpose: Samson spent years pursuing his passions, which led to blindness, bondage, and humiliation. But when he finally turned back to his purpose, God restored his power. What passion has been competing with your purpose? What would it look like for you to lay down your personal desires and fully embrace the calling God has placed on your life?